The Bi-Polar Opposite to a Shrinking Violet

noobtheloser:

"Just keep walking. If I really commit, he’ll just assume I meant to do this."

I honestly just did this so I could draw the bird looking back like that in the last panel. Hahaha look at him.

I do a lot of these.

So do other people.



wtfbadfantasycovers:

That is a pretty awesome title though.

wtfbadfantasycovers:

That is a pretty awesome title though.



definitelynotsatan:

every ship needs a mr and mrs smith au tbh


smokecigarettesamongstthestones:

My brother says “shit happens” in response to everything

My brother was given a “shit happens” mug because of this

My brother loved his “shit happens” mug like a child

Last week, my brother dropped his “shit happens” mug

You probably know what his reaction was


americqchavez:

"poc or queer characters are not important for the storyline"

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the-average-gatsby:

alright you guys have posted some pretty bad jokes on here but not one comes close to this doozy

brace yourselves

so there’s a far-off place that consists of a perfectly triangular lake surrounded by land, with three kingdoms on the three sides of the lake. the first kingdom is rich and powerful, filled with wealthy, prosperous people. the second kingdom is more humble, but has its fair share of wealth and power, too. the third kingdom is struggling and poor, and barely has an army.

the kingdoms eventually go to war over control of the lake, as it’s a valuable resource to have. the first kingdom sends 100 of their finest knights, clad in the best armor and each with their own personal squire. the second kingdom sends 50 of their knights, with fine leather armor and a few dozen squires of their own. the third kingdom sends their one and only knight, an elderly warrior who has long since passed his prime, with his own personal squire.

the night before the big battle, the knights in the first kingdom drink and make merry, partying into the late hours of the night. the knights in the second kingdom aren’t as well off, but have their own supply of grog and also drink late into the night.

in the third camp, the faithful squire gets a rope and slings it over the branch of a tall tree, making a noose, and hangs a pot from it. he fills the pot with stew and has a humble dinner with the old knight.

the next morning, the knights in the first two kingdoms are hung over and unable to fight, while the knight in the third kingdom is old and weary, unable to get up. in place of the knights, the squires from all three kingdoms go and fight. the battle lasts long into the night, but by the time the dust settled, only one squire was left standing - the squire from the third kingdom.

and it just goes to show you that the squire of the high pot and noose is equal to the sum of the squires of the other two sides


randomingoftherandomness:

shubbabang:

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i dedicate this comic to the teacher who pulled me out of class in middle school to tell me my bra strap was showing and that i needed to get a jacket to cover it up so that i didnt distract the boys

dedicated to all teachers, school administrators, parents, dudes, dudettes, random ass strangers, politicians and dogs who think that is a woman’s duty to ensure that men aren’t ‘distracted’


perpetuallyfive:

On the set of ‘Pitch Perfect 2’ in Baton Rouge, LA (5.21.14)

#is this the new avengers #they look like superheroes (via konako)


jean-luc-gohard:

I was born in the wrong generation. This generation is still racist as fuck and I can’t download a pizza. Wake me up in the year 3019.


goth1989:

wes anderson is like quentin tarantinos weird younger brother who sits in his room playing records and gets mad when quentin hides his library card 

posted 5 hours ago via cesaray · © gothaliens with 5,237 notes

sararye:

alwaysactually:

lusilly:

some muggleborn like “i want to be an astronaut when i grow up!”

wizard kids like “wtf is an astronaut”

"oh you know…the people who go to the moon"

of course you can’t just go to the moon you need a rocketship

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#hp

nyooms:

being against gay marriage does in fact 100% make you homophobic sorry

posted 6 hours ago via pizza · © nyooms with 135,577 notes

fyeahlilbit3point0:

Do you think directors get sad when they realize they will never make a more perfect action sequence than the castle siege set to “I Need A Hero” from Shrek 2?